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Honouring Connor

“To my darling Flocks

Words can not express the love I have for you, from the moment I held you in my arms, I knew how very special my life was going to be with you in it.

My world became better, and our family was now complete. The love, compassion and caring I learnt from you made me a better person. Every single moment shared with you was a blessing.

I remember your 1st day a pre school how you hated it because mummy wasnt there, so I got a job there just to be near you, school trips, swimming classes, reading with your class – all so I could be close to you.

I loved watching you grow into the person you have become, being a friend to everyone no matter what age. You never judged anyone, you always listen and never made a comment until you were asked and then you would speak and we would all listen because you were the one who made sense of it all.

I have never felt pain and emptiness like this before and i know i will never be the same person I was before BUT because of you and how you lived and loved life and then gave life, I will try my hardest, I will find the strength to make you proud of me. To shout from the heavens that’s my Mum.

I am so very proud of you, you taught me so many life lessons thank you, and thank you for being you. I love you so very much always have, always will. Until we meet again stay with me I need you more than ever. See you in my dreams xxxxx 5 is alive”

love Mama xxxxx

“Our sweet son,

I know i told you all your life that I loved you, I meant it from the bottom of my heart!

Since you were so cruelly taken from us, I also tell you every day how proud I am of you!  You are such a massive part of our family, and always will be.  I am trying hard to be the strong one, but its so hard son, if you wasn’t so gentle, loving, caring, hard working, considerate and special it wouldn’t be so hard, I will live my lives remainder trying to make you as proud of me as i am of you.

I will love you with every fibre in my body, to be known as your Dad makes me feel like bursting with pride, call in on me every day sweet boy, i need it!!”

Love your Dad xxxxx

” My brother, My best friend, My everything. I don’t know how I am going to live without you – My Hero

love your big bro Calz ”

“My wonderful and perfect baby brother Connor,

I am sorry too that I am letting you down by the way I am but the pain is just unbearable. I miss you more then words can say, you have always been my world and I just wish more then anything in the world to have you home and see your beautiful smile, hear your voice, your laugh and have a great big cuddle.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being you I have been proud of you from the second you were born and I will be for eternity. You are the worlds greatest!! Not only do I have my pain but the pain I feel for the fact that my precious Stanley has had you taken away from him too! I know he misses you too thats why he gets so excited at your big picture we have at home!

Thank you for keeping close to me I know you are with me and Stanley always. I love you Con more then your ever know, always have and always will. My angel, My hero, My brother!! Love you sweetheart. See you in our dreams.”

Love your Big Sis, Courtney xxxxx 5 is alive xxxxx

“My darling beautiful precious grandson Connor,

I miss you with every heart beat and every second of every minute of every day. The days are so long. I miss you so much – the hurt I am feeling is unbearable.

I look at your beautiful photos and they give me a little smile as you always put a smile on my face, you always made me laugh. I have just found one of your photos where you are about 7 years old and your sitting on my lap your head on my shoulder and your arms wrapped around my neck. I look at this and it gives me a little comfort.

You are my soul mate. Until we meet again my darling Con we will soldier on and fight the battle that comes before us.”


Your soul mate Nanny Mal Your BELOVED Nanna!!!!!

“Connor, I wake up everyday and know that my life will never be as good as it was when you were in the world.

I miss you more as the days go on and I know that this is a pain I will feel for the rest of my life. You were the most amazing loving boyfriend.

We are only apart to meet again, forever missing you and loving you.

Always Your Courtney”

“My beloved Flocka,

Whatever I write here will never ever do you justice, explain the pain I feel, but ultimately the amount of love I had, and still have for you!

You made me an uncle for the 5th time – I waited 15 years for you to come along, and boy were you worth the wait: you were the most beautiful and smiliest chunky monkey imaginable, and just like the 4 times before, I agreed in my uncle contract to love you like you was one of my own, which I did.

As life went on you became a friend to me, as much as my nephew, and our times up at Chelsea will never be forgotten. As an uncle, you enter into a spiritual contract to love, care for, and protect your nephew, the first two I did with aplomb, but I’m sorry I could not do the 3rd..I’m just thankful that grand dad was there for you!

The pain that is felt for your taking, is the other end of the scale of the love we had, and still have for you.  I have learnt so much about you Connor Charles Edward Saunders, since you have gone, I have learnt at to what extent your giving and kind nature went, how you helped people, and the compassion you have showed…all without telling us about it, and that is the characteristics of one of gods earth angels! You gave us life spiritualy when you were here, but you have given it physically after your taking, and that is proof that you were as close to perfection as you could get, and it is up to us to follow your examples, to do you proud, and to carry on your fantastic, beautiful work!

We can not let you of been taken in vain, you see Connor, you lived more in 19 years, than most would do in 100 lifetimes, that is how I strive to be.  Thank you for blessing us with your love, your kindness, your gentleness and your teachings!  For you truly were saintly, you were my nephew, and most of all my friend!

Please hear me when I talk to you, hear me when I say I love you, hear me when I say I miss you, hear me when I say I’m so proud of you, and help me along life’s path please, because my heart has been broken,and will never be the same again, so all the help you can spare would be so appreciated!  Please do what I asked of you when I stroked your hair, and whispered in your ear as you were resting on your bed.   Please look over Tilly and Stan, and please drop in on your old Unc now and again, to let me know what magical and wonderful things you’ve been doing.

You were too good for this earth babybear, and you now have your wings, fly high and do not look back… Connor Charles Edward Saunders, you were born an angel, and died a legend.I was blessed to of had you in my life, and I will look forward to cuddling you again.”

Your friend, football partner and Uncle,
Mut xxxxx